When I was 12, if anyone had called me “Grace”, it would have been entirely ironic. I was as klutzy as a newborn giraffe and literally broke every single thing I touched. I never got better. Over the years, I have come to terms with my personal lack of coordination, but there are certain things I always have to avoid because otherwise things will be broken. Here are 10 ways to avoid being a bull in a China shop!
10 Ways To Avoid Being A Bull In A China Shop
1. Stay away from any type of glass, especially if it’s not yours: My rule of thumb is to keep my hands to myself when it comes to glass because God knows I have broken so many glasses. So. Many. Glasses.
2. Proceed with caution when drinking anything except water: I am dead serious when it comes to wearing your least favor shirt in order to at least minimize the risk of spilling your drink.
3. Watch out for your own two feet; they are your worst enemy. Avoid shoes that will make your feet even more of a hazard than they already are: like heels (a klutz’ worst nightmare).
4. Avoid wearing white unless you happen to be a magician at removing stains. It took me years of staining every piece of white clothing that I bought before I started to wear bibs in order to prevent any stains.
5. Remember most stores have a “you break it, you buy it” policy so don’t touch anything you cannot afford! Better yet, just don’t touch anything.
6. Never cook without supervision—trust me. My Achilles’ heel is making a meal that requires multitasking and timing each part of the dish so it finishes at once (without burning down the kitchen). Thankfully, I haven’t burned down a kitchen to this day, but my husband (the chef) is always close by with a fire extinguisher.
7. Don’t buy an expensive phone without getting insurance or you’ll regret it. I used to have the newest iPhone, I believe it was a baby blue iPhone 5, and I loved it SO MUCH!!! I loved it right up until the day it fell out of my back pocket and directly into the toilet.
8. Warn people when you first meet about your clumsiness; the sooner the better! One of the first things you should tell someone you’ve just met is that you are clumsy; trust me it’s worse if they find out on their own (usually after you face-planted into their China cabinet).
9. Keep paper towels handy because you will spill every liquid within a 10ft radius. Better yet, buy stock. That way you get a return on your investment!
10. Try to remain calm when you have a klutzident because freaking out makes you clumsier (believe me). So, last piece of advice: being clumsy isn’t easy and sometimes it can be so frustrating and overwhelming that it might cause some slight anxiety. In my case I become SO flustered that I end up knocking things down left and right, at which time I just sit down. After that I take a deep breath, give myself some time to calm down then go clean up my mess. You will be fine. Things are things. Don’t panic, no matter how much you break!