It’s Almost Christmas and I’ve Never Felt Less Christmassy In My Life
I really love Christmas.
Christmas is truly my time to thrive.
The magic in the air. The giving. The joy from being surrounded by those we love.
But this year, I’ve struggled so hard with finding that Christmas spirit and magic.
Trust me, I am really trying.
I am trying to be that holly, jolly mom and wife but I am seriously lacking.
I’ve never felt less Christmassy in my life.
While I’ve really tried to tell myself that it’s okay to have a minimal Christmas, to have less presents, less holiday decor and less people, I’ve had a really hard time actually believing it.
Christmas is a time we spend with our extended family and the thought of not seeing them this year, is heartbreaking.
Of course, we will make the best of it.
We will FaceTime family and make the holiday the best we can for our children but it’s not the same and it SUCKS.
In the 30 years of my life, I cannot remember a time I’ve ever felt this sad and unhappy about the holidays.
I am trying to keep perspective and remind myself how truly lucky I am to have my husband and kids during this time.
I will do all the holiday things and put on a happy face but inside, my heart is aching. My joy is gone.
So, if you are struggling with the holidays this year, just know you are not alone. I feel you.
oh my Dear !!! I hear ya !!!! This year is probably the most “un-Christmasy” I have ever felt in my life. There is Covid… and then my Brother-in-law was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer in November of this year, He lives downstairs….. and is losing his battle as we speak. I am doing my best. God knows that Christmas has always been MY time to shine. I usually love the candies and cookies, the whole meal planning, the shopping, wrapping and decorating. NOT this year. I have done my damndest to even do the minimum. Sucks…. but it WILL get better. Here is to all of us Mom’s ( AND older) that are just trying to get through this year.