Marriage

My husband and I don’t really do lovey gifts. Valentine’s, anniversary, whatever. He doesn’t care if he gets a gift on Valentine’s Day. I used to care. A lot. Mostly because I’d been taught to care. All those TV sitcoms where the goober of a husband forgot a special day and had to scramble to …

Over and over I’ve seen other moms talk about their stretch marks as ‘tiger stripes’, ‘warrior scars’, ‘hope wounds’, but I hated mine. And the worst part was I couldn’t tell anyone how much I hated them. I remember starting the conversation with a friend of mine. “I had the baby and now my skin …

Marriage is hard on everyone. Sure, at first it’s all honeymooning and sex and being on your best behavior, but at some point the guard comes down and life gets messy. We’ve all been there. You love your spouse, but if they do this one horrible thing one more time you swear to GOD you will …

When we marry our sweetheart most of the time we’re young, kinda dumb, and basically broke. I mean, a lot of us, at least. Let’s get real: most of us do not have the fairytale marriage that we dreamed of when we were five. You know, that marriage we practiced out with the Barbie and …

I grew up doing rodeo, which meant that carnivals were my playground. Carnie food was my vending machine. There are a number of foods that people associate with the state fair or a traveling carnival that I associate with my childhood. All of it. Some foods you can get just about anywhere. Cornie dogs, cotton …

Adventurous. Selfish. Daring. I’ve been called a lot of things since my now husband and I chose to elope mid-May, and I have no regrets. Most girls have visions of the princess wedding, the dress, a cake, the family and friends, their prince charming. Heck, when I went to seminary it was common for girls …

I’ve crossed quite a few personal lines in the last three-plus years that I’ve been with my husband. He’s seen my make-up free cheeks in all their blotchy, pink glory. He’s seen the purple half moons that show up under my eyes when I’m tired. He’s seen my greasy hair pulled back in a bun …

I’m engaged. It’s still weird to say those words. My boy-er-fiancee and I have been together just under five years. You’d think the progression of dating, co-habitating, and getting married would be pretty standard by now. But it’s still so weird! That’s another post entirely. This one? It’s about…the dress. *gulp* I’m Excited About The …

I don’t care if my husband watches porn. Like at all. Well, I mean, not while he’s driving…or when he’s supposed to be taking out the trash. But if I’m not home and he’s got a spare minute? He’s welcome to peel his own carrot. Now, for some of you this is a non-issue. Of …

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and while many on Twitter are bragging about their romantic plans or lamenting the lack of a date, these fine men and women know what we really want — to be entertained.  I’ve compiled 21 thoroughly wacky tweets about love, dating, and massive exasperation guaranteed to make you laugh. 21 Funny Tweets In …

Let’s face it – we all want to present the better side of ourselves to our (future) spouses, and their families, and while the ones we love will eventually become aware of all of our flaws, as we will become aware of theirs, it is human nature to try to convince our in-laws that we …

At the time of writing this I’ve been engaged (that’s such a weird word to use in regards to…well…me) for almost five whole days. My long time boyfriend proposed on New Year’s Day. We waited a few days to tell family and close friends. This was, essentially, to ease ourselves into the chaos that is the …

I’ve been married to my wonderful husband for 14 years. He knows me better than I know myself, in most ways. However, for holiday gift-giving, it’s always hit or miss… and, that’s okay. I love him no matter what. I get just-because gifts throughout the year and I don’t hang on hopes of something extravagant …

While perusing Reddit the other day I came across a post asking “What is one seemingly inconsequential decision have you made that changed your life?” Many of the responses were along the lines of randomly deciding to be nice to the new kid and thereby making a new best friend for life. Another recounted the …

I suppose I’d always imagined that if I ever made a late night trip to purchase a humidifier it would be as a last ditch effort to comfort a sick kid. As I pulled into the Wal-Mart parking lot at 10:45 PM I realized I was half right. But the sick kid was my husband. …

It’s ingrained in us, that need for romantic love and connection. It puts us on our best behavior during those early, get-to-know-you days and adds a rosy haze to our outlook, causing us to miss those early clouds forming over our new romance. Don’t get caught in a shit storm of what should’ve been your …

Let me start by saying I am married to an amazing man (whom I love to death) who willingly put his life on the line for his country to protect his home, his family, and the freedoms we so carelessly take for granted. During his time in the army, he saw some pretty unspeakable horrors, …

It seems like everywhere my husband and I go, people stare at us. At first I might have passed it off as there must be something on my face or in my teeth, I eventually came to my senses and realized it wasn’t that simple. I guess the reason why people couldn’t remember that staring …

Regardless of your kid’s age, working in sexy time with your spouse is hard (ba-dum-bum). Juggling work, sports schedules, piano lessons, parent-teacher conferences, dog walking, dinner making, and laundry doing can suck the libido right out of you if you let it. But when the stars align and Daddy has done the dishes, the last …

It’s no secret that I’m a little on the anti-social, introvert, was that guy flirting with me or did he just need my number because they always ask for my number at CVS side of things. I don’t mean to be; it’s just who I am. In high school I was the wallflower with the journal sitting …

Divorce sucks. It doesn’t matter if you were the divorcer or the divorcee, it doesn’t matter who was at fault, none of that matters– what does matter is that it’s a time in your life when you are forced to hit a reset button. You can choose to use that reset button for good or …

Like a lot of families, my dad was the “bread-winner”. He worked days, nights, weekends, holidays. The guy nearly killed himself because of all the stress he was under. Literally. When I was seven, my dad tried to shoot himself in the living room of our small rent house. Oh, those carefree summer days of …

Here it is. Your wedding. Mr. or Mrs. Perfect-For-You popped the question, and you said, “yes!” One of the most important days of your life, and you want it to be perfect…Perfecter than perfect. Before I go any further, let me be the first to offer you some big whopping congratulations! Wouldn’t it be completely …

Marriage is a huge step; it often seems like the logical conclusion and an inevitable action once you have been in a relationship for a certain period of time. However, it is a very serious commitment: two people getting married are committing to a lifetime together, in sickness and in health and until death. Before you …

From the minute you said ‘I Do’ you’ve had issues with certain members of your new husband’s family. They’re different than you (you didn’t realize how different until now), they’re strange about how they deal with normal things, they eat their food on the wrong side of their mouth. Right now you are experiencing life …

Let’s face it – your guy is pretty amazing; but, he also doesn’t like to talk about himself. Why is that? Maybe it’s his selfless attitude, or he’s just a private person. Guys aren’t usually the masters of talking. Either way, you’re lucky to have him in your life. When you’re dating or even if you’re in …

You were once in love. Do you remember how that felt? Now, you can’t stand being at the same table anymore. His chewing is disgusting, and he says he never realized how dead your eyes look when you talk. How did you get here? Intimate relationships are great at first. The two partners involved enjoy …

I’ve got to say, men, we’ve really let ourselves go. We’re like that significant other who kept it tight for the first year then tossed it away in a slippery slope of Fiddle Faddle and Orange Is The New Black binge watching. I don’t like what we’re becoming: a pack of callow, feckless man-babies. I …

What’s the deal with thongs? Seriously, I need help with this one because I’m just not finding the purpose behind them…not even a little. I have about 87 reasons why I don’t wear them, but I’m really curious about you women who do. My roommate wears them. She says it’s to avoid panty lines. Know …

First off, June Cleaver is a freakin’ liar. No one smiles that much after spending all day cleaning their house, taking care of kids, and somehow creating a dinner fit for magazine covers. No. In fact, if she were real and expected to do all that she’d probably be crying in a corner by 4:00 and …

Reddit user bpwwhirl asked his wife to draw a picture of what’s on her mind. And…it’s a lot. And…it’s amazing. Basically, it’s the same things that are on all of our minds, I guess I’d just never seen it in picture form before… Yes, yes, yes, to all of this. Throw in a little bit about …

It’s your day off and you just got the most amazing, well deserved massage ever.  You’re definitely not dancing to One Direction in the car on the way home when your husband calls. “Hey Babe! I’m here at Bonefish with Steve and Don (colleagues). Their wives are on the way- can you make it?” You swallow …

Anyone who’s been in a romantic relationship has experienced it–that new-love rush, when you can’t get enough of each other and think you’ll feel that way forever. But then marriage, jobs and kids come along and you forget all the things you used to love about each other in the first place. Like cooking a …