I can’t find my keys, we have to walk home

Yesterday was a big deal. We moved my daughter into her first house. She lived in the dorms last year for college, and that’s always just sort of felt like summer camp. Not real.

But now, now she’s all living in a house with roommates and they’re gonna split bills and try to do dishes and laundry on a schedule, and oh man is she in for the coolest year of her life.

This was the first big milestone we faced just me and her. Honestly I think that’s what pushed me to get married so fast the second time… I just couldn’t face those big milestones without a dad there. I don’t know why. I did a lot of trying to fit square pegs into round holes, I guess.

So, I had to figure out how to get all her stuff from our house to her college, and I had to do it with my (ex)husband threatening her, trying and steal her car from her, etc. That’s the thing about when you finally tell people that you’ve been with a man who’s been abusive for the last ten years… he tends to get really upset you aren’t keeping his secret anymore.

Well, if there’s one thing I have learned through all of this, it’s that I can’t do it alone. So I tagged in a dear friend, who I have absolutely no idea how I am ever going to repay, rented a cute little uhaul, and we loaded ‘er up and that was that.

And the thing is, when you take a friend with you, and not an abusive controlling man to help you move things in, it’s so much nicer.

Nobody yells because there isn’t enough gas in the uhaul. They just pull into a gas station and take care of it.

Nobody gets mad at you because you remembered everything except for the rope to tie stuff down, so now you have to use an intricate system of bungee cords and string. They just laugh with you while pulling things as tight as we can and give you one of these 🤷🏽‍♂️.

And then, when you get back from an insane day of packing and unpacking and moving and all that stuff, and you discover that you have lost the keys to your car when you go to drop off the uhaul, so you guys are going to have to walk home and grab the spare set in the rain, a friend that understands you’re doing your best, and just trying your hardest… that friend doesn’t even bat an eye.

They walk back with you, smile on their face the whole time, telling stories, laughing at the whole situation, and even though you feel like you screwed up huge, you still get to have the perfect move-in day memory with your kid.

Oh, and the best part? Since it’s a great story about an awesome day instead of an awful one… When it turns out your keys were actually in your friend’s backpack all along. It makes the memory even better.