Being the person everyone can count on sounds lovely until your own plans are the things that never happen. The favor, the extra task, the thing you said yes to before checking whether you had anything left to give. Suddenly, your whole week belongs to somebody else.
BOLD: How Women PLAY BIG by Leading Instead of Pleasing, the new book by Barrie Zucal, takes on that pattern. Released October 14, it asks women to give their own ambitions a place in the decisions they make.
When being “good” gets expensive
On her official book page, Zucal calls the conditioning that keeps women pleasing, performing and putting others first “debilitating goodness.” Her book combines memoir, reflection and practical guidance about boundaries, self-trust and leadership.
The useful distinction here is between choosing to help and automatically making yourself available. A yes can be generous. A yes you feel unable to refuse can leave you with a life you barely had a vote in.
This is familiar territory around here. Our earlier piece on being everybody’s go-to person gets into how quickly all those little favors can pile up. Zucal’s book brings that conversation to the choices women make about work, family and their own development.
She started powerlifting at 70
Zucal began powerlifting at 70 and went on to set Maryland state records in the deadlift and bench press, according to the book’s announcement. Her official biography also includes work as a marriage and family therapist and founder of a global executive coaching company.
Picking up a barbell at 70 is a pretty good response to the idea that you should have figured out every interesting part of yourself by now.
Her book’s leadership angle reaches beyond a job title. The author describes it as relevant to women raising families, running businesses, changing careers or deciding what comes next. You can lead a team and still struggle to put your own needs on the calendar.
Where to find BOLD
BOLD is published by Palmetto Publishing and runs 286 pages. The author’s book page has retailer options, including Barnes & Noble and Bookshop.org.
If you’re looking for a book about boundaries with an emphasis on what you want to build, rather than just what you want to stop doing, that’s the conversation this one is opening.
