Category: Heavy Handed Advice

Heavy Handed Advice is exactly what it sounds like — opinions you didn’t ask for but probably need. This is the corner of the internet where I tell you what I’d tell my best friend, which is sometimes “you’re right” and sometimes “you’re being ridiculous.”
What kind of advice is on TTB?
Life stuff. Money stuff. Relationship stuff. Parenting stuff. The kind of advice that doesn’t come with a 17-step plan or a $99 download. Just honest takes from someone who’s made every mistake worth making and lived to write about it.
Who writes the advice posts?
I do. Jamie Slack — blogger since the AOL days, currently raising one kid and several houseplants. If I write it, I mean it.
Got a question that isn’t covered here?
If it’s the kind of question you’d ask at midnight when nobody else is awake — love, work, the weird dreams — that’s exactly what I built Elementually for. No scripts, no judgment, just answers.

Here’s A List of Different Types of Chickens and The Colors of Eggs They Lay

Did you know that there other chicken eggs besides from brown and white?

And if you wish for a more colorful basket when retrieving your eggs come morning, it depends on the type of chicken in your coop that determines the color of your eggs.

However it’s important to note, that the color of the eggshell does not determine the nutritional value or taste of the yolk or egg whites inside.

So with that in mind, here is a quick guide of chicken breeds for a more colorful egg basket!

If you remember when Martha Stewart posted a photo of her blue eggs overflowing in her basket, the chickens that lay light blue eggs are the Ameraucanas, Araucanas, and Cream Legbars.

Now when it comes to green eggs, there are several breeds that can lay different shades of green.

Courtesy of @dayspringlanefarm

For example, Easter Egger chickens (and yes this is a real breed of chickens), will often lay a rainbow of eggs that aren’t just colored green and Olive Eggers are aptly named for producing olive-colored eggs.

You can also count on the the Isbar breed to lay a range of green-colored eggs in different shades from mossy to mint green.

Courtesy of @dayspringlanefarm

If you would like to see a few pretty and pink eggs when collecting the eggs from your coop, the Light Sussex, Mottled Javas, Australorps, Buff Orpingtons, Silkies, and Faverolles chicken breeds will lay pale pink to creamish-colored eggs.

Courtesy of @badluck_creations

Considering now you know which chicken breeds lay which egg color, your egg baskets will now be filled with a colorful palette come morning!

Courtesy of @tinaziska
7 Fun Alternatives To Dyeing Easter Eggs

We are dangerously close to Easter, and the price of Eggs just keeps going up, up, up.

That kind of puts a damper on all our eggy Easter activities — dyeing eggs, egg hunts, deviled eggs, and the like.

It’s time to get creative, and see what fun alternatives there are to using tons of expensive eggs.

Side note: I never thought I’d be uttering the words “expensive eggs,” but here we are.

So, here’s what you are going to do. Think outside the box!

Be creative, have fun, and you won’t even miss those hard-boiled money suckers.

7 Fun Alternatives To Hard-Boiled Easter Eggs

First — get your hands on a bunch of those plastic eggs. They will come in handy for a lot of these activities.

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You can find bulk Plastic Easter Eggs for around $7 on Amazon.

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Then, you’re going to pick some fun activities, and get to getting with the creativity and fun.

1) Birdseed Easter Eggs – Super easy and fun!! You’ll use the plastic eggs as a mold.

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Pro-tip: Cover them in peanut butter before you hang them. Birds will LOVE it.

You can get the directions for making Birdseed Easter Eggs HERE.

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2) Decorative Paper Eggs – Have small kids that will miss the dying of eggs?

Use these simple Paper Craft Ideas to get their creative juices flowing. They will have just as much fun — and it might save you a little mess. BONUS!!

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Get ideas for Decorative Paper Egg Crafts HERE.

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3) Egg Sugar Cookies – Make egg-shaped sugar cookies, and let your kids go WILD decorating them.

Heck, this activity would be fun for kids — or — you can have a girls’ night out, cookie decorating party! FUN!!

4) Easter Greeting Cards – Handmade Easter Greeting Cards would be fun to send to relatives and friends for Easter.

OR — you could be brave, and go take them to a nursing or assisted living home. The residents would love it!!

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5) GAK Filled Easter Eggs – This is a fun, and totally on trend, alternative to dying Easter Eggs.

Get the directions for making GAK Filled Easter Eggs HERE.

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6) Learn To Draw A Bunny – Skip the eggs altogether, and focus on the bunnies!!

Follow this fun tutorial for learning to Draw A Bunny HERE.

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7) Decorate Plastic Easter Eggs – You have all those plastic eggs, fill them up with treats, and let your kids decorate them to their little hearts’ desires.

Use stickers, markers, puffy paint, or whatever other crafts you have on hand.

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People Are Freaking Out Over This Video Of Freshly Cut Meat That is Spasming

Ew. If I ever needed more of a reason to be a vegetarian, this is it.

There is a video floating around the interwebs that shows what happens when butchers add salt to fresh meat.

It’s not only disturbing, it will make your gag reflex stand at attention.

Apparently, according to allrecipes.com, butchers add salt to the meat to draw the water out and to help preserve it.

But, I’m going to tell you. There is absolutely no reason I ever needed to see the reaction fresh cut muscle has to salt. *Barf*

In the video clip, a butcher holds out a piece of freshly cut meat that has been covered in salt.

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You can watch as the surface of the meat wiggles and trembles from the chemical reaction caused by adding salt.

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This only happens with the freshest of meat.

You can rest assured, this piece of meat is very fresh and is from a freshly slaughtered animal. The central nervous system is dead, but the nerve endings in the muscles are still firing, resulting in the jumping. This will stop after a short time
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I’m just going to say what we are all thinking — Ew.

Think of this trembling meat the next time you dive into that hamburger. *Shudders*

Side Note: Veggies and fruit don’t quiver and quake when you add salt. Just saying.

You can watch the video of the trembling meat HERE.

@weirdterrifying
How Much Does It Cost To Raise Chickens?

Eggs. I don’t even know what to say. They have jumped like 5 bucks a carton in the last couple months.

It really has people wondering if owning chickens might be a more viable option than trying to keep up with the inflation on eggs.

I mean, eggs are in just about EVERYTHING. We used them for cooking, baking, breakfast — we even have an entire holiday (Easter) surrounding the egg.

But, how much does it really cost to raise chickens? Is it really worth it?

You have to admit. It’s a great time to jump on the chicken bandwagon. There are so many people raising chickens right now.

Backyard coops are trendy af and über popular.

How Much Does It Cost To Raise Chickens

Now, it is important to note that I do NOT currently raise chickens.

I do, however, have lots of friends who are obsessed with raising chickens.

They have helped me break down the cost associated with raising those feathery egg layers.

So, probably your BIGGEST cost in owning chickens is going to be the coop.

You can go several ways here: Make your own or buy a premade coop.

Check out these cute premade coops on Amazon. They average about $150, but can go as high as $3,000.

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Then, you need actual chicks. I mean, you can totally buy adult egg-laying hens, but they are going to be more expensive than day-old chicks — which will run you about $2 to $4 each.

You do want to consider that if you buy day-old chicks, they will need to be kept in a brooder with a heat lamp for the first little bit.

You can get this brooder with lamp on the Amazon website for $89.

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Also, it’s quite possible that one or more of your day-old chickies won’t make it to adulthood, so prepare yourself for that reality.

Your biggest recurring cost is going to be the chicken feed. Yep. They have to eat — like every single day. LOL!!

A mature chicken will go through about 1 1/2 pounds of feed per week, and the feed usually runs about 50¢ to 75¢ per pound.

So, obviously, the more chickens you have, the more you will be spending on feed.

You will also have to have bedding for the chickens. There are so many choices here, but let’s just go with wood shavings for this example.

It’s easier to clean than traditional straw bedding, and easier is a plus in my book!

Wood shavings are going to cost you about $10 to $20 for a bale.

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Those are the basic bare essentials you will need to start your own chicken community.

Miscellaneous Costs Associated With Raising Chickens

You will also probably want a chicken feeder, like this chicken feeder we found on Amazon for $69.

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The chickens will also need a waterer. We found this poultry watering fountain on Amazon for $50.

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Other things you need to think about, that we can’t really give you a figure for, are things like pest control and vet bills.

So, is it worth it to own chickens rather than buy eggs at the store?

That is going to be something that YOU decide.

But, remember, you can also sell the excess eggs the hens lay. What a great small business opportunity.
9 Inexpensive Substitutes For Eggs That Really Work

Good gosh! Let’s talk about eggs for a minute.

I bought an 18 carton of eggs before Christmas, and it was $3.49. I just went to the store — 8 BUCKS!!

That is scary, because eggs are in EVERYTHING.

Have you ever tried to cook or bake without an egg? Yeah. It’s probably not going to happen.

Luckily, thanks to Grandma and her recipe box, we can totally substitute so many things for eggs — saving the actual eggs for breakfast.

9 Things You Can Substitute For Eggs In Recipes

Now, it is important to note that I’m NOT telling you these subs are good to scramble up and eat.

They are literally for baking or cooking — recipes that call for eggs.

1) Applesauce. Don’t ask me how it works, but it totally does. My grandma used to use applesauce in place of eggs in all of her cakes. You just add about 1/4 cup of unsweetened applesauce, and omit the egg.

2) Banana. Yep. I’m serious. Mash about 1/2 a ripe banana, and it can be used in place of an egg in most recipes.

3) Silken Tofu. It’s a soy product, and you can use it to replace the egg in most recipes. It is important that you get SILKEN Tofu — the soft stuff. Puree about 1/4 cup of Silken Tofu to replace an egg in your recipe.

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4) Vinegar and Baking Soda. This works the best in baked products — breads, cakes, cupcakes. Something about the chemical reaction that happens when you mix the vinegar and baking soda makes your baked goods light and airy without egg. Just use 1 teaspoon of baking soda and 1 tablespoon of vinegar. Mix it together before you add it to the recipe.

5) Peanut Butter. Or any nut butter, really. It is going to change the flavor of your baked goods, but you can use about 1/4 cup of nut butter to replace an egg in most recipes.

6) Chia Seeds. Just mix 1 tablespoon of chia seeds with 3 tablespoons of water to replace one egg in recipes.

7) Plain Greek Yogurt. Flavored yogurt is going to alter the flavor of your baked goods, but 1/4 cup of plain greek yogurt is perfect to replace an egg in most recipes.

8) Oats. Yep. Like oatmeal. Just mix 2 tablespoons of oats with 3 tablespoons of BOILING water to replace one egg in most recipes.

9) Cornstarch. You can mix 1 tablespoon of cornstarch with 3 tablespoons of water to replace one egg.

Try it out, and let us know what you think. Maybe one of these subs for an egg can save you a chunk of change at the grocery store.

Melinda Isom
Did You Know That You Can Freeze Eggs? Here’s How to Do It Correctly.

Leaving the house for a week with a batch of eggs leftover in the fridge?

Yes you can freeze your raw chicken eggs but there’s a right way to do it.

According to the FDA, you should never freeze your eggs in the shell nor an egg that isn’t fresh, but you already knew that.

However, the best types of eggs to freeze are (whisked) whole raw eggs, raw egg whites, and raw egg yolks; although if you’re not sure on how to freeze either egg variety properly, here’s how to do so correctly.

How to Freeze Eggs

Starting with raw whole eggs, if you notice there’s half a carton left of eggs before you leave for vacation, there’s no need to make a six egg omelet.

Instead, crack the eggs in a separate bowl and gently whisk.

You’ll then want to add either a 1-½ tablespoons sugar, 1-½ tablespoons corn syrup or a ½ teaspoon salt per cup of eggs via the National Center for Home Food Preservation depending on what you’ll be using the eggs for when you return.

Grab a muffin tin or an ice cube tray and pour in your raw eggs to freeze, measuring three tablespoons of your raw egg into each compartment if you’re using an ice tray according to the NCHFP.

Once you have frozen egg cubes, remove and package them in a moisture-vapor resistant container says the NCHFP.

To freeze only the egg whites, keep in mind to gently mix the whites until it feels smooth and strain with a sieve; package the whites while leaving ½-inch headspace, seal, and then freeze per the NCHFP.

And when it comes to the egg yolks, first, separate the yolks from the whites and stir gently.

Add in 1-½ tablespoons sugar, 1-½ tablespoons corn syrup or ½ teaspoon salt per cup of egg yolks depending on what the yolks will be used for when you cook or bake them into your next dish via the NCHFP.

Strain the yolk mixture and package while leaving a ½-inch headspace; seal, freeze, and you’re done per the NCHFP website.

Now that you properly know how to freeze whole eggs, egg yolks, and egg whites, you can omit wasting food and save money too!
Meet Willy Wonka, The Dog With Two Crocheted Ears

Meet Willy Wonka, and no we aren’t talking about the character who works in a chocolate factory.

Courtesy of @sacramento_spca

Rather this Willy Wonka is a two year old pup who lost both of his ears.

Courtesy of @Sacramemto SPCA

After getting caught in a fence and attacked by dogs in a nearby home, emergency veterinarians had to remove Willy’s ear flaps which resulted in the loss of both ears according to a spokesperson who told WMTW News 8.

Courtesy of @sacramento_spca

Since then, a registered veterinary technician named John Holmquist helped nurse Willy back to good health and came up with the idea to crochet ears on a headband that Willy can wear!

Courtesy of @sacramento_spca

“In about an hour or two, just whipped him up something after some measurements and the next day just giggled to myself as I put it over his head,” Holmquist told WMTW News 8. “He wasn’t really happy with the hat, but he’s a happy boy, so he was good enough to take a bunch of pictures for us.”
John Holmquist

Courtesy of @sacramento_spca

The SPCA in Sacramento later then posted Willy Wonka with his new ears via Facebook which gained over three thousand likes and a caption that read, “When you lose both of your ears after a dog attack, but your vet tech knits you new ones,” according to the post.

Courtesy of @sacramento_spca

Holmquist noted that he feared Willy may not find a new home because of the scarring left behind from the removal of his ears.

Courtesy of @Sacramemto SPCA

“I was really worried that a bunch of people were going to see all of his extensive scarring and be really worried about his health or look over him or worry he’d be dog aggressive. I worried that he wouldn’t get a good home,” he mentioned to WMTW News 8. “As soon as he had that hat on everyone was interested. I’m glad he got adopted.”
John Holmquist

Courtesy of @Sacramemto SPCA

Willy Wonka has since been adopted and has found a forever home!

Courtesy of @sacramento_spca
Jeremy Renner Is Officially Home From The Hospital Following His Freak Snowplow Accident

It’s been just over two weeks since Jeremy Renner had his tragic snowplow accident.

That accident left him in the hospital, where he had to undergo a couple surgeries to repair the trauma.

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Jeremy suffered blunt trauma as well as orthopedic trauma when his PistenBully snowcat went rouge and ran into and over him.

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We were all relieved to see his first update from the hospital. He looked a little worse for the wear, but seemed to be in good spirits.

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A couple days later he posted a video that showed his sister washing his hair with a dry shampoo cap.

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NOW, he is OUT OF THE HOSPITAL, and recovering at home.

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Jeremy was able to post an update Monday night, and it’s so great to hear that he is doing better!

Outside my brain fog in recovery, I was very excited to watch episode 201 with my family at home
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Fans were quick to offer kind words and encouragement in the comments to Jeremy’s Tweet.

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Our well wishes and thoughts continue to be with Jeremy as he makes his recovery.
Simply Mixology Juices Are Here, And The World Of Adult Beverages Just Got A Little Bit Sweeter

The world of mixology just became a little bit sweeter — one might even say it became Simply Sweeter.

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Some of my FAVORITE juices to get at the store are the Simply juices.

You know — they have Simply Orange, Simply Apple, Simply Lemonade — and more.

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Simply Beverages are delicious, made with only not-from-concentrate juices and are always kept chilled — Our not-from-concentrate orange juice has never contained added water, sugar or preservatives and is gently pasteurized to ensure that you always get a fresh-squeezed taste experience.
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Now, Simply has one upped the game by bringing us Simply Mixology beverages, and I just did a little happy dance!!

The Coca-Cola Co.

My go-to mixology drinks usually have those highly concentrated, highly sugary additives — you know the ones. You get them on the shelves of your grocery store.

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Oh, don’t get me wrong. They are tasty, and have their place in the adult beverage lineup.

But, it’s about to get turnt in this juice joint!!

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Can you just imagine adding your adult spirit of choice to a Simply Juice Drink?? YUMMMMM.

Simply is bringing out THREE mixology beverages, and you can guran-dang-tee that each one of them is going to hold a special place in my fridge.

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Strawberry Guava Mojito was crafted with an abundance of flavor for a refreshing and fruity sip with a hint of mint
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The Coca-Cola Co.

Lime Margarita is a classic Margarita-style experience so good that you can almost taste the salt on the rim
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Peach Sour features a sweet peach taste paired with a hint of sour and warming spices for the on-trend mixologists in your home
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The Coca-Cola Co.

All three flavors will be hitting grocery store shelves on January 23rd, and I’ve already cleared out the space for them. LOL!!

Packaged in 52-ounce bottles at select grocery stores nationwide including Shoprite, ALBS, Meijer and more, Simply Mixology feature a QR code that consumers can scan on the bottle for recipes to create in the comfort of their own home.
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These Taco Plates Take Taco Tuesday to The Next Level

In my house, Taco Tuesday happens several times a week.

I mean — it’s tacos. Do I really need to explain myself?

And, anything I can do to make tacos just a little more easy and fun, I’m doing.

That’s why you should really check out these Taco Tuesday Plates that I just came across on Amazon.

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Each plate contains space holders for three tacos. THREE!!

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You can place the tortillas in the slots, and build your tacos right there. YUM!! Fast and mess free!

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These taco plates are great! No more mess from falling over tacos! Would highly recommend.
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PLUS, there are two extra compartments — maybe chips and queso? Or salsa and guacamole??

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These were a hit at my party. We had a Mexican Themed Party with Mexican food of course and these were the perfect plates for what we served. You can have three tacos and two sides like rice and beans ect … You get three different colors. These are nice to keep for future use. Great quality and sturdy.
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Get this, my favorite things about these Taco Plates as a mom: They are BPA free, dishwasher safe, and break resistant.

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The stackable taco trays help you conserve space in your cupboard. Dishwasher safe for a quick, easy cleanup. An alternative to disposable taco holders.
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Each set contains twelve Taco Plates in three different colors: Red, Green, Blue. Fiesta ready, right?!?

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These Taco Plates run $43 a set, and they will make Taco Tuesday a game-changer at your house.

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You can get your own set of Taco Tuesday Plates on the Amazon website.

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