Breast Is Not Always Best, And We Need To Stop Telling Women That It Is!
Breast is best. Almost from the moment you see those beautiful double lines, you start hearing that mantra. And you’ve seen research. Listened to friends. Had plenty of doctors tell you the same. Offices have lactation rooms.
Breastfeeding is legal in literally every single public space in America.
So why would so many people go through so much effort to educate you on the benefits of breastfeeding if it truly wasn’t the best option? And what about formula? Is it even safe to give babies formula? Why would any good mom give her child chemicals when breast is best?
Think baby formula is poison? Think again! The truth is chemically it isn’t much different than breastmilk, and when it comes to feeding babies, fed is truly what’s best.
Breast Is Not Always Best, And We Need To Stop Telling Women That It Is!
For most of mankind breastfeeding was the only option available for newborns. There was no debate on whether it was best, because it was all that was available. And while some advocates will tell you that what’s worked for thousands of years is still the best option today, that’s not actually the case.
For those thousands of years, there were still babies who couldn’t breastfeed. Those who didn’t die from starvation usually grew up malnourished or sickly. Their lives sucked because they couldn’t eat.
And I’m not saying breastfeeding is bad. Not at all. What I’m saying is that fed is best.
Sometimes women don’t produce enough milk, or the act of breastfeeding is so excruciating that it raises stress hormones in mom (which are also bad for the baby). Or in cases of foster children or adoption, breastfeeding isn’t an option. There are some babies who can’t tolerate breastmilk (I was one of them) and alternatives have to be found.
Because when we don’t look at alternatives, the unfathomable will happen.
We’ve indoctrinated our society into believing breast is the only option to the point that sometimes new mothers can’t even tell when their own baby is suffering.
Jillian Johnson is a mom who experienced that first hand. When her new baby Landon was born, she wanted to do everything right for him. And that meant breastfeeding. At the hospital the lactation consultant assured her his latch was great. She fed constantly, did everything she was told to do. But Landon cried. All the time.
Within 24 hours of being discharged from the hospital, Landon went into cardiac arrest. He was severely dehydrated and as a new mom, Jillian had no way of knowing that her son truly was not receiving Any milk during all the times he fed. Landon died at 19 days old from starvation…one bottle…one single formula-filled bottle would have meant the difference between life and death for a little boy who would be five years old today.
But formula is poison, right? Truly, it is not.
The chemicals that make up baby formula are as closely paired to the chemicals found in breastmilk as possible. And while there are some benefits to breastfeeding, those benefits do not outweigh the need to make sure a child is fed and growing. Ultimately shouldn’t that be the big goal?
Over the past couple of decades breastfeeding has become big business, and corporations have cashed in by not only promoting products and supplements to make breastfeeding easier, but also by regurgitating hand-picked pieces of data to support their stance, rather than educating women on the full picture.
So women have done everything they could to fall into rank. There have been women who fed around the clock, women whose exhaustion caused them to fall asleep on top of their babies.
There have been women who spiraled into post-partum depression due to not being able to give their children their basic birthright.
And women like Jillian whose children suffered unnecessarily because they believed breastfeeding was the only option.
Again, I’m not saying not to breastfeed. I’m not in anyway advocating for formula-only feeding. What I’m saying is that fed is best. Babies need to grow. For some women breast is best. For some formula is best. We need to take a step back and remind women that we will support them no matter which road they take. Their babies lives depend on it.
I am horrified by your opinion piece
I have spent my life reading research around breastfeeding, working with breastfeeding mothers and being a breastfeeding Mother myself.
How arrogant to think a man made substance could improve on nature
Did you read her article because that’s not at all what she wrote. She wrote that breast feeding may not work out 100% of the time and formula will literally save your babies life if it’s needed and shouldn’t be vilified.
This article was full of inaccuracies and blatant lies tbh.
Of course if a person cannot feed their baby some other accommodations have to be made. I sincerely doubt that infant rejection of breast milk was as common as you make it sound though. There were also women who were lactating that could take up where the (usually “upper class”) women didn’t nurse.
As for formula being better – assuming that we are talking about non-toxic and well nourished mothers – you should slap yourself silly for that.
There are ORGANIC (so-called) infant formulas which illegally use petrochemical toxins for extraction purposes and there IS residue. Illegal. There are fake organic formulas that use GMO fake fatty acids.
There are missing proteins, enzymes and co-factors. The mother and baby do not communicate through formula whereas when nursing if the mother detects a pathogen in the baby – a cold germ say – she makes antibodies or other immune factors that fight that issue in that baby. Totally automatic and perfectly customizable symbiotic iimmune system.
If one CAN nurse and the baby doesn’t reject it – NURSE for crying out loud.
As for the baby that didn’t get any milk – the lactation excppert said there was a good sucking reflex, right? So it would basically be impossible for the baby to have NOT sucked anything down. The mother would have become swollen and sore.
You can bet the baby had it’s intestinal flora destroyed by god-____ vaccines and died from them indirectly. SIDS has been proven to be caused by vaccines – definitely some. The Fed vax court ruled on that. Heart failure? That can easily happen from low O2 levels – which can easily happen when vaccines cause neural damages – and that can onset days and months later – and this fact is accepted by the vax industry too so there’s no squirreling out of it.
Nice article from a woman who is not even a mother.
Breast is ALWAYS best… why do you think so many formulas strive to be like breast milk? Not everyone can breastfeed though and that doesn’t make them any less of a mother, but when the boob juice is available you better believe it’s the gold standard for a reason.
Breast is ALWAYS best even if we have to support women’s other choices because articles like this undermines the will to breastfeed. Because if breastfeeding was the only choice like it used to, nobody would have problems breastfeeding. But nowadays, even if we wholeheartedly want to breastfeed, on the back of our minds we know there’s another choice, so when things get tough we sought for alternatives. But breastfeeding is always best even though there are women that for whatever reason can make it. When I had to formula fed my first baby because I felt in this sabbotage, I made peace with it but still knowing breast is best.
This is exactly what I needed!! I’ve been feeling pushed to breastfeed when it’s not what I want to do. Overall I want my baby to be healthy and know that their getting what they need is the most important thing! Anyone I’ve sooken to, even people without children are trying to convince me to at least try to breastfeed and it has me feeling under pressure but after ready this I know in my own head that for me formula feeding will be best.
Thank you as I’m sure you’ve helped other woman in my position also.
Do what you feel comfortable with it was on the fence with baby #1 but I ended up with pre-eclampsia and all the meds I was on after delivery was unable to try breast feed and you know what i don’t regret it to or feel guilty now or with baby#2 who also was formula fed because it worked the first time so why change what I knew
I feel sorry for your baby…
I couldn’t even finish reading, this makes me mad. First of all formula is nowhere near as nutritious as breast milk, second of all the more you feed the more you produce it is the supplementing that mess up the whole thing.
I agree that when baby is having trouble gaining weight and there’s a clear need to supplement then formula is the way to go. Formula isn’t an enemy.
But… don’t tell everyone that it’s the same thing as breast milk.
I’m not a big fan of breastfeeding myself because of its inconvenience but I’ll still be doing it for my baby, because it’s best , because my breast milk is specifically designed for my baby.
Yes it’s painful, yes it’s inconvenient, yes it’s a lot of work especially at the beginning, but at least worth trying.
Ps. About poor Landon boy… where were the doctors to advice on supplementing? How come the mother didn’t notice that baby is getting slimmer? This is just shocking to me.
I see where you are coming from, but we must not assume that all mothers are living a life free of harmful medications that are dangerous to babies. We also now have breastpumps that can offer stimulation to increase milk supply, sometimes this is just not enough. This is not a debate about formula, this is about reducing the stigma and encouraging moms to do what is best for their child. Period. We must also educate our moms of their options, giving formula until breastfeeding is established and milk is plentiful can happe, it isnt always a permanent solution. I find many moms to think they can never go back to breastmilk only.
SUrly you don’t mean breastfeeding is inconvenient
I think the total opposite so convenient ! Milk on tap ?
I love your post, I have a 1 month old baby and she has a mix dieta I breast Feed the most of the Day but I also give her 5 to 10 Oz of formula between breast feeding sesions because sometimes my milk its just not enough for her no matter how long I fed her it could take hours she was still hungry.
When I had my had my first baby, I tried breastfeeding. Within 5 days, I had down-on-my-knees-crying pain. I didn’t know at the time I had candida in the breast. I was dreading when my baby wanted to eat off me. I associated her with pain. I wasn’t bonding with her.
I went to the La Leche League about my pain, the airhead just said, “Get a nursing pillow and make sure she latches on correctly.” She insisted, “Breast is best” and formula was NOT an option. That session cost me $200.
I went to the lactation consultant at the hospital I gave birth at. She didn’t understand, but let me borrow one of the breast pumps for a week, but it was just to let my crusty, weepy nipples heal until I started breastfeeding again, because “Breast is best”. I don’t produce milk like a cow like some women can even though I have large breasts, seems strange, but yes. Baby wasn’t getting her full and cried a lot.
My baby was loosing weight. I knew there was going to be a stigmata not breastfeeding, but she needed to eat. So, I decided to do formula. And, this is where I disagree with you, formula is not just as good as breastmilk, it just isn’t. Looking at ingredients, high fructose corn syrup, corn syrup solids, palm oil (which is hard for babies to digest), gmo this, gmo that. I did organic, but organic is NOT 100% organic, the only thing organic is the powdered milk, all the other ingredients are not.
Having said that, I do agree that “Fed Is Best”.
It is funny how we went from a society who scorned “poor” women who breastfed because formula was best. Now we have this “Breast Is Best” crowd that looks down on you if they see a bottle. Moms with uncovered, naked boobs in public feeding their babies in the “most beautiful and natural way”. I received many a dirty look and glare for giving my baby a bottle. Concerned family, in-laws, and friends gave me their condolences. But, she got fed and is now a healthy 4 year old. You’d never know she was bottle fed.
This is truly horrible to read.
Are you aware that one feed of artifical milk in a baby whose gut is open (it closes around 6 months when baby is ready to start food) changes the gut bacteria for a very long time – possibly irrevocably. We have no idea what health issues this can cause down the line.
And to say that breastmilk is virtually the same as formula. Do some research and look at scientific facts rather than spout an uneducated opinion.
Does artificial milk contain hormones such as melatonin?? It is only secreted at nighttime in breastmilk to help baby sleep.
Can artificial milk produce antibodies to viruses a baby has been exposed to? No it can’t. Can breastmilk – yes.
Has breastfeeding babies shown to be beneficial for pnd? – yes.
Fed is bare minimum.
Only 2/3% women are not able to produce enough milk for their baby.
And what about donor milk??? The World Health Organisation reccommends breastmilk from another mother over formula.
A read of Maureen Minchins book on breastfeeding (available on Amazon as an ebook) would be worthwhile for you – she talks about the negative compounding effect of generational use of formula and how it is manifesting as health issues in grandchildren of mothers who have been formula fed.
It is our society – and articles such as this that fail women who wish to breastfeed, Mary.
Mary, your intolerance and ignorance is shameful.
I agree with one thing you say: fed is best in that a fed baby is yes, always going to be better than a starving baby hands down. But I don’t agree with the tactic taken here.
I think what everyone is referring to as “brainwashing” at the doctors is misconstrued support over the concept of breastfeeding. They want you to be educated and informed because once baby comes it is hard. It hurts, you are tired and all you want is your husband to be able to take a feeding. But if you are informed about all the wonderful reasons to work at it, you will have willpower in those long hours of the night to continue and push through. You will also be empowered to seek help if something seems off. Then once you push past, your milk is established and you and your baby have developed a good team it is an amazing experience and one I was a little sad when it was passed.
I have had friends that had tough breastfeeding journeys or even one who pumped for 6 months solid the whole time her baby was in the nicu and he still never breastfed, but I have never had one friend upset because they tried it. Be informed, look past the first few weeks and make your own decisions about it. There are countless benefits (like you can seriously eat anything you want and still lose weight…or your uterus shrinks faster…just to name some selfish ones, not to mention the incredible amount of nutrients and immunities for baby!) but you have to be informed for anything.
Don’t let fear stand in the way of anything you want to do.
This article is incredibly careless and devoid of true substance, which is my problem with blogs written by non-professionals who have an opinion that is not backed by actual research or fact. The implication that a child perished 24 hours from birth from dehydration is a hoax, fabricated here for the author’s purposes. As a medical professional and a mother of 4 children, whom I breastfed until they were two or three-to promote this sort of rhetoric is irresponsible and ridiculous, and frankly insulting to the intelligence of your readers. No healthcare organization or pediatric group in the free world would discharge an infant at a 24 hr mark that was failing to thrive insomuch that they were approaching cardiac arrest. Especially considering that arrest in a newborn would be preceded by more than just “crying”. If this child did in fact pass, and after reading this junk I am inclined to doubt he actually existed, there are no details of the co-morbitities that would have been at play for any of this is even be reasonable scenario. The breast is best, for mother and baby. Formula should be a second option, not a go- to because some fool a computer said a baby died from breastfeeding. Stop blogging, lady. Try scrapbooking or something less dangerous to public health and safety. I usually never leave comments, but this was just to much
Yes!! This!! I am a critical care nurse and there would have been other signs baby was not thriving. No wet diapers, no poops, no weight gain ect. There’s no way drs would’ve let this go. Even if this story were true, there is much more to it than the author is saying. Perhaps the story is even being stretched a bit to support the authors stance. But either way I agree this article was wayyyyyy out of line
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Thank you sooooo much for writing this article Mary. I was so determined to breast feed until I realized my new born son couldn’t get rid of his jaundice because he was dehydrated. The hospital where he was born strongly encouraged mothers to nurse to the point that they didn’t consider giving my son formula or even providing me with the option. It wasn’t until he went for his 4 day check up that his pediatrician suggested he have some formula since I wasn’t producing enough milk. I tried for 4 months to pump and formula feed but could never produce more than about 1oz. My son too could’ve suffered even more of it wasn’t for the formula he was given. Thank you again and again for writing this guilt free and life supporting article. Many blessings and comfort to the mother who lost her baby. That is truly heart breaking. Blessings to you all
I am horrified that you would include a story of an infant death implying breastfeeding being the cause of death. If I had read this article before having my baby I don’t think I would’ve even attempted breastfeeding! This is spreading unnecessary fear!
Although I agree with not shaming mothers for formula feeding because it’s an amazing tool and can definitely be a lifesaver. There is nothing wrong with formula feeding! Formula feeding is good! But it is not best. Fed is not best. Fed is mandatory. You can’t just not feed your baby! Formula is a great option, but it will NEVER be better than breastmilk. Breastmilk is made especially for your baby and changes hourly. The antibodies and nutrients in breastmilk can not be replicated in formula.
Just as often as mothers are shamed for formula feeding, they are shamed for breastfeeding. Speaking from experience. My daughter has been exclusively breastfed for 8+ months and since she was a month old I’ve received nasty comments for breastfeeding. Almost anytime we go anywhere I hear, why are you still breastfeeding? It’s ridiculous.
Thank you for offering a new perspective! While i agree with (most) of what you state in the article, and with the grand ‘Fed is best’ as the ultimate, i would like to point something out. I believe when folks say ‘breast is best’ it’s because scientifically, it is. If you look at breastmilk under a microscope it moves with love organisms. When you look at formula under a microscope it’s perfectly still since it’s manmade. While it’s meant to mimic breastmilk in its properties, it’s impossible to do so 100%. I believe when ‘breast is best’ is mentioned it’s with this concept at the forefront, at least that’s the way i understood it. Thank you once again!
This article screams ignorance.
I’m so sad for baby Landon and his momma. What an awful tragedy. Thank you for this article and I agree fed is best. I wish we as women would lift each other up and encourage one another than trying to tear others down.
I have 1 kid that was straight formula fed and another that I was able to straight breastfeed. Guess what? They’re both perfectly healthy, strong and smart! Every woman should be able to either formula feed or breastfeed without having to feel judged by ANYONE. As mothers we know what’s best for our kids and shouldn’t look for others to decide what’s the best option. Formula and breast milk both are fine as long as baby gets what they need. In the beginning of breastfeeding my second child I had some difficulties and always looked for answers but all I would find is me beating myself up because of all the judgmental MOTHERS out there. You are no less of being a great mother if you chose formula and you are not a better mom because you chose to breastfeed. Instead of helping out moms who actually look up articles to HELP them or give them piece of mind you just bash on their decisions.
I have exactly same condition, which is my milk can’t satisfied my baby. In this case I need another option to help me up and it is formula. It’s happen with my 2nd child.
Different condition with my 1st child, I’ve got babybluess for almost 1 years half while searching how to be able to breastfeed my baby. It’s become a stress which is painful and make me want to cry everytime I remember that moment ’till now.
Until someone says to me, it’s oke if your milk can’t produce more than the other women. One thing that you have to realize it’s about the quality and not always about quantity.
If you give your milk in your best condition, good mood, eat well it will influenced your baby in further.
I disagree. Moms need to be educated and state the facts why they don’t breastfeed. They don’t breastfeed because they don’t educate themselves on everything they need to know to nurse their babies. I also disagree with the author that she couldn’t take in breast milk. Mothers are supposed to eat nutrious foods, rich in proteins, carbs and healthy fats to keep the milk coming in. If there was no money to buy expensive formula, how would you nourish your new born? There would be plenty of dead babies or malnourished because of moms poorly breastfeeding their babies.
The saying isn’t breastfeeding is the “only” option. It is breast is best for a reason. This article neglects to cover the many added benefits most babies will receive from breastfeeding over formula. It’s obviously a tragedy that that mom didn’t know her baby should have been having wet/soiled diapers and that she could have weighed her baby before and after feedings, but it isn’t accurate to say there was no way for her to know. Clearly the baby was also crying a lot, so she could also have taken the baby to the doctor a lot sooner. Thank God there is formula for women who can’t breastfeed, so these babies can survive and have a similar nutrient content, but there are added benefits to breastfeeding that can’t be ignored. The research is clear. I have had quite a bit of exposure to lactation consultants, nurses and organizations that promote breastfeeding, and none of them have told me it is the only option. Btw, there was nothing in it for them, they weren’t working for a profit. And formula is a 47billion dollar industry compared to a meager 1.5 billion for breastfeeding helps. So that argument doesn’t make sense either. I have had multiple children benefit from breastfeeding, including a preemie for which it was vital. This article distorts the importance of breastfeeding for most children. It seems like common sense to me that there may be exceptions, and a mother should trust her own instincts along with the best information she can obtain. That said, I’m not into shaming mothers who can’t breastfeed, and maybe this article is a reaction to someone else doing that, but just because someone offended you doesn’t mean you write a slanted, inaccurate article.
Ive heard about Landon’s tragedy a lot and have always wondered about wet diapers and weight gain. They never really explained that. But I agree w your statement. Such a tragedy but I do wish they would explain all the days leading up so mothers can really learn from this. I think following up a a bottle isn’t always a good idea but they should continue to encourage BF. This article made me second guess me BF. That’s horrible. But your post gave me confidence I was doing right. Whatever the mother decides breastfeeding or formula let’s uplift and support e other. RIP Landon. PS my son is named Landon too.
*Following up w a bottle is a good idea!
It’s so sad that so many women think or are told they don’t produce enough milk, when in fact they are, and babybis just cluster feeding. In the case of a baby screaming every time it feeds and dies at 19 days old, this is terrible and what an excruciating pain for his parents, but with all the visits from the health nurses and midwives we get in those (almost) first 3 weeks – if he was getting nothing HOW could they have not picked up on his weight not returning to birth weight after 2 weeks. Something seems wrong there. The message is Breadt is best, because it IS. But if you can’t or don’t want to then fed goes without saying! We are so lucky that we have formula as another option where we didn’t before, but that doesn’t mean breast is not best. It also doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with formula, not at all, but there’s nothing wrong with a silver medal at the olympics either.
I am experiencing low milk supply. This is def a thing for some women. My baby was under weight and was nursing all day and night. I decided to take a couple of days and formula feed him and then pump at those feeding times. Sure enough my supply was low. Barely getting half an ounce at each pumping session. So yes some women really do have low supply and it’s not just cluster feedings. If I didn’t start giving him formula who knows what would have happened. Now he gets breast, if still hungry he then gets my pumped milk, however much that is, and then formula. I want him to keep getting my breast milk. But if it’s not enough you gotta do what’s best for baby. Fed is best.
I don’t understand why some people are so aggressive in their comments… first woman should have a choice whether breastfeed or not! Second it’s entirely true that everyone at the doctor’s brainwash you about how breast milk is THE ONLY good food for the baby. They compare formula and milk and oh my God how formula is poor in ingrideints and doesn’t help you bonding! After all these lectures I was determined to breastfeed ecxlusively and guess what? I didn’t produce enough milk! Then I tried a thousand of foods and teas and tricks, and support groups and lactation specialists and got depressed at the end! Because nothing worked! So my baby was formula fed and he is the healthiest and the mat handsome baby on Earth!
Bravo Mary and don’t read these insults here, they’re not worth reading.
I don’t actually agree, breastfeeding is always best for the baby (nutritiously, conforts them, helps their immune system in so many ways, helps develop their brain and much more) so if the mom can’t breastfeed then it’s unfortunates, but the best option would’ve still been the breast (perhaps someone to breastfeed for her). I do agree that for personal reasons a mom should and must feel take the decisions they want without feeling ashamed! I hate when people get judgemental, bottle fed babies are not in harmsway, but we can’t deny the facts
Thank you for sharing this! I tried breast feeding and my son had a major reaction to my milk. He threw it all up once he finished eating. Somebody called me selfish for not trying harder to breastfeed. Visits to the ER because your baby hasn’t eaten in 24 hours is terrifying. He prefers formula. Fed is best!