15 Things You Do Because You Are Lonely
Loneliness. It creeps in slowly, doesn’t it? At first, it’s just a quiet Friday night, and you convince yourself that a solo Netflix binge is all you need to recharge. Then, before you know it, you’re talking to your plants and naming your vacuum “Steve” because it’s the closest thing you’ve got to a roommate. Loneliness isn’t always about being alone, though; it’s that nagging feeling that something—or rather, someone—is missing. Maybe you’ve lost touch with your friends, you’ve been stuck in a monotonous routine, or everyone else seems to be on some grand adventure while you’re at home Googling “best pillow to cry into.” The point is, we’ve all been there. Everyone gets lonely from time to time, but not everyone reacts the same way.
Some people get productive (congrats to those weirdos). Others, well, do things that are a little more… questionable. You might not even realize it, but your lonely brain is sneakily convincing you to do things you never thought you’d resort to. Things that seem completely rational at the time, but in hindsight, make you go, “Wait, what?” If you’re unsure whether your loneliness has been making decisions for you lately, here are 15 things you probably do when you’re lonely.
Binge-watch entire seasons in one sitting
One episode turns into three, which turns into a whole season, and suddenly it’s 4 AM, and you’re emotionally invested in a fictional character’s breakup. You tell yourself you’ll stop after just one more, but Netflix asks if you’re still watching—and honestly, you don’t even know anymore. The saddest part? You barely remember what happened because your brain checked out four episodes ago.
Text your ex “just to check in”
Ah yes, the classic. You tell yourself it’s just a friendly, platonic message, but we all know where this is headed. You craft a “casual” message that sounds like you’re totally cool and thriving (even though you’ve been in bed all day), and when they don’t reply? Panic. But when they do reply? More panic.
Talk to inanimate objects
It starts with yelling at your printer because it refuses to work, and before you know it, you’re holding full-on conversations with your microwave about whether you really need that second bowl of ramen. Maybe you even ask your dog for advice about what movie to watch. Spoiler: The dog doesn’t care, but the loneliness is real.
Scroll endlessly through social media
You open Instagram just to check for new notifications. Forty-five minutes later, you’re 63 weeks deep into a stranger’s vacation photos, wondering why your life isn’t as glamorous. You don’t even know this person, but that doesn’t stop you from comparing your day-old sweatpants to their perfectly curated beach pic.
Make plans and immediately regret them
In a moment of bravery, you say yes to social plans. Drinks with coworkers? Sure! Dinner with friends? Why not! But then the day comes, and you’d rather be hit by a bus than leave your house. You consider faking an illness, but instead, you go—and count down the minutes until you can leave.
Start unnecessary projects
Loneliness is the perfect fuel for your inner DIY enthusiast. You decide it’s time to reorganize your entire closet, start a new scrapbook, or repaint the living room (without knowing what color you even want). Halfway through, you realize you have no idea what you’re doing, but you’re in too deep to back out now.
Message random people from your past
Remember that person you had a class with in high school? No? Well, apparently, loneliness does because here you are, sending them a message out of nowhere. You ask how they’ve been and immediately regret it when they respond with, “Who’s this?”
Watch cooking videos without ever cooking anything
You sit down to watch one five-minute cooking tutorial, and before you know it, you’ve spent two hours watching elaborate recipes that you’ll never attempt. Somehow, you convince yourself that watching someone else make a soufflé counts as a productive use of your time.
Buy things you don’t need online
Retail therapy is real, and when you’re lonely, it’s a slippery slope. One minute, you’re browsing for a new phone case, and the next, you’ve got 12 items in your cart, including a life-sized cardboard cutout of Ryan Reynolds. Because why not?
Stalk your own social media
What’s the best way to remind yourself of all the fun times you’re not having right now? By stalking your own Instagram feed, of course. You scroll through old photos of you having fun at parties, vacations, and with friends, and wonder why life isn’t like that anymore. Spoiler: those were staged too.
Have deep, introspective thoughts at 2 AM
Loneliness has a way of creeping into your brain when you least expect it, like right before bed when your mind decides it’s the perfect time to question every life choice you’ve ever made. Is this where you thought you’d be at this age? Should you have taken that other job? Why is everything temporary? You’re not prepared for an existential crisis, but here we are.
Text multiple people and regret it immediately
You’ve spent all day with no one to talk to, so you decide to send out feelers to every contact you have. That old friend you haven’t spoken to in months? Sure. Your cousin you only see at family reunions? Why not! Ten minutes later, you realize you’ve bitten off more than you can chew, and now you’re in six different conversations with no escape.
Refresh your email for no reason
Maybe this is the day someone sends you something interesting! Spoiler: It’s not. You refresh your inbox approximately 15 times a day, hoping for a miracle, but it’s just spam emails and a coupon you’ll never use.
Take naps for no reason
Napping is the cure for everything, right? You’re not really tired, but a nap sounds better than doing anything productive, so off to bed you go. You wake up groggier than before, still lonely, and now also confused about what day it is.
Daydream about hypothetical relationships
When you’re lonely, your imagination runs wild. You fantasize about bumping into a cute stranger at a coffee shop or having a meet-cute at the grocery store. In these daydreams, you’re effortlessly charming, and they’re immediately smitten. But alas, reality hits when the cashier asks if you want a receipt, and you realize you’ve been in your head for the last 20 minutes.
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