I'm out to dinner with my husband when the screeching starts. I roll my eyes, looking at the child standing backwards in the booth in front of me. She starts to bounce up and down on the pleather seat, as she continues to screech and laugh. Her mother tries to get her to turn around and sit down, to no avail. This only seems to make the child laugh harder, causing quite the scene. "That will NEVER be MY child," I say a little too loudly to my husband. "My kids will mind me, and they will do what they are told. They will NEVER act up in public! Those parents should learn to control their Keep Reading >>>
That Time I Ate Bugs To Get The Taste Of Foot Out Of My Mouth
A few months ago my brother, J.J., and I visited my Dad’s house. Dad needed some help with a few things around the house and that called for some extra man-power. Fortunately, we got the water heater installed. Unfortunately, it didn’t work. We had to wait until the next day to call the hotline (Ha!) to figure out the issue. So, the day’s work done, J.J. prepared to do what he always does when we go back to our hometown, and vanish into the night to visit with some old friends. Since Dad’s house was without hot water, I decided to tag along in hopes of getting a shower. You know those Keep Reading >>>
When You Refuse To Pick Up After Them, Sometimes You End Up With Living Room Chicken
I had a couple of college roommates in my time. My first roommate had been a good friend of mine. I’d known her since elementary school although we really only became best friends in college. When I decided to move to north Texas I dragged her with me. We got an apartment together and it was a magical 12 months. Unfortunately we lived together for 18. You see, I was the Oscar Madison to her Felix Ungar. We had totally different definitions of clean. I liked to sleepwalk clean the kitchen in the morning then just sort of wake up and have it done. She couldn’t sleep if there was a dirty pot Keep Reading >>>
I didn’t get to spend Easter with my Family
I didn't get to spend Easter with my family, and it was more emotional than I ever thought it would be. Every holiday I find myself dreading going to family events. They're crowded and being the only single, childless person there puts me in this 'odd man out' place that somehow feels worse Because I'm around family. It's stressful, too. Old stories that are embarrassing get told, and retold and retold. Like, the time I was nine and rolled the minivan downhill into the neighbors living room. Or how I had crushes on all of my brothers friends and used to do weird things like sing to them Keep Reading >>>
About The Time I Cried Because My Sandwich Had Mustard
I hate mustard. Mustard is the sauce of the devil. So, when I finally sat down at the end of the day to eat a meal with my family, and I tasted the evil satan-mustard, I cried. Today, I cried over a sandwich. But you know what? It wasn't about the sandwich. I was overworked and I was tired and I wanted the day to end with a nice family meal, we all sat down to dinner together, my daughter had started talking about her day, my mind was a thousand different places because of life, and everything, and instead of just dealing with all of that, I lost it because my sandwich had mustard on Keep Reading >>>
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