Pooping

As everyone who has ever had major surgery knows, they never let you go home until you’ve had a bowel movement. They have to make sure the anesthetic didn’t effect the bowels and so even when you’re ready to get out of those horrible hospital beds and midnight interruptions awaking you to make sure you’re …

Okay, so, I know you’re probably thinking “What the crap?” (ha!) but I’m going to break it down for you so you can get the straight poop. I’m sure to disgust pretty much everyone who reads this, but you know what? Since I was a little kid, I always made up very…. odd analogies to …

It all starts out casual. Your child gets invited to a playdate and the mom has wine and cheese set out for all the other parents. Pretty much best mom ever, ammiright? So everyone’s laughing, and sipping, and you swallow that third bite of brie when it hits. The urge. You look around. It’s okay. You’re …