I Time Warped To A 20’s Housewife During Lockdown

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After 15 plus years of working outside the home, I decided to work from home part-time and have more time to watch my 4 children grow.

The modern 2020 woman takes advantage of all technology and tips and tricks found on sharing boards to organize everything from kids lunch snacks to their own conference calls.

We use planners and apps to make sure we remember to pick up the dry cleaning and our groceries that are already packed up and put into our cars.

Then the lock down happened.

Conveniences were stripped from us, restaurants closed and there’s no more curbside pickup of groceries because of supply limitations.

We now wake up and shower and figure out how to meet deadlines using only meetings by conference calls and emails.

Now that our kids are homeschooled, we’ve been promoted to fulltime teachers of multiple ages in one classroom setting.

Personally I have a kindergartner, a third grader, and a high schooler, and that’s all I can handle. Thank goodness the college kid is on his own.

Instead of running to the closest market to grab a salad or sandwich for lunch, we are now preparing lunch for everyone in the house and menu planning for the week.

Since we didn’t find any bread on that last grocery run, we are making hamburger buns from scratch.

Did you know those suckers take 4 hours to make? No lie. It takes four hours to make one pack of hamburger buns, and here my family is wanting hamburgers like they’re living the life of luxury.

Oh, and now I am also in charge of making sure all the beds are made every day since we are all around all the time and the temptation is just too good to jump back in.

But what I really want to know is, who bought my children 17 blankets and 43 stuffed animals each? Was it me? I should be FIRED. And how wrong is it if just one animal each slips into the donate bag?

Oh, and can we talk about how everything in the whole house is sticky? When did that start? Was it always like that and I am just now noticing? Or are my kids actually producing more stick now that they are home. Is that an actual thing? I am making a note to ask about this at the next parent teacher conference, whenever that will be.

And, because my husband is an essential working during all of this, I have to help out where I can, making sure the fridge is stocked with cold beer, carpets are nice and vacuumed, kids bathed (from the stick), and now basket weaving bacon to the perfect tight squares for the burgers. Because the four hour buns weren’t extra enough. (Why oh why did I go on Pinterest again?)

And I have to do it all with a smile, because the last thing he needs when he walks through that door is more stress, am I right?

There are now sticky notes of all sizes all over my house and notes on my phone full of recipes and tips for how to support our spouses during this time.

Our laptops and tablets bookmarks are filled with educations sites. We are figuring out our gym class and art class routines. Reading books together.

As a now time warped 20’s housewife, I have traded in my business casual attire for an apron and I have more flour and sugar on my face than make up.

Instead of sharing the newest trend for blending foundation, we are banding together and sharing ideas on how to make your paper towels stretch and the best way to get your yeast to rise.

Times have changed, or have they just gone back to the way they were?

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