Mom, If You Want to Keep Me…

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So, we’re sitting on the couch watching the MTV movie awards an educational program on PBS, and my daughter says, “Mom if you want to keep me, then you have to make sure nothing bad happens to me ever.

Oh no. What is she talking about?

So, I ask her, “Halle, what do you mean by badness?”

Well, like this:

  • Make sure I don’t eat spicy food.


Oh, I can definitely do that. No problem there! But, then… she says there’s more.

  • Like don’t let me get chased by a dinosaur.


Dinosaur chases, we’re good. As long as that small old man with the Amber in his cane from Jurassic Park doesn’t ACTUALLY use bird DNA to make scary velociraptors, then that’s definitely within my power. Oh, she has more though!

  • You can’t let me wear huge glasses.


Oh, of course Halle! I mean you don’t want to end up looking like those scary girls from the Hills with their tiny noses. But, then she tells me there’s another thing…

  • Well, you need to make sure that no giant tomatoes hit me.


WHOA! Has she already SEEN The Attack of the Killer Tomatoes. I better make sure she doesn’t–because apparently there’s already a real threat there! Finally, she tells me that she has one final thing, and here I’m thinking this must be the real one that’s going to make me feel like I’m not doing my job as a mom. Here it goes…

  • You have to make sure they never all happen at the same time!


Oh, Halle I promise never to make you eat spicy food while wearing huge glasses and being chased by a dinosaur and I throw giant tomatoes at you!

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  2. Oh I love this!! She is too cute! After reading this I though, I have to tell my husband.

    As soon as he walked through the door two seconds ago I did and he cracked up! The hills comment is so hilarious.

    Your daughter is precious btw.

  3. You never can be too prepared…you never know when those things can happen Mom!!! LOL!

    Dejoni’s last blog post..Rent a Rim

  4. How cute! How do kids come up with this stuff?? Although I gotta say – I love me some big sunglasses.

    I’m stopping by from SITS to welcome you and say hello. I’m so glad you decided to join the community. It’s a great way to meet people and find some fabulous new blogs!

    Andrea’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday: I have a….

  5. This post cracks me up! It’s so funny! On the other hand, her requests are just fair enough:)
    Oh and also , i would appreciate if you would just help with some input on my blog! Thanks a bunch!
    Happy Wednesday!
    (coming here from SITS)

  6. Sounds like good requirements to me!

    Blond Duck’s last blog post..Coconut Queen 5

  7. If ever there was a promise made to be broken…=)

  8. i too was watching something intellectual on sunday night *wink* LOL i wouldn’t spend 3 hours watching a teen show just to see the delish-ness that is rob pattinson!

    those are such hilarious things to be worried about!

    stopping by from SITS to say hi!

  9. brilliant story telling! …and can tell it was oh so true too!