Tina Belcher is the oldest daughter in the Fox animated series Bob’s Burgers and she is WISE beyond her years. These 21 Tina Belcher quotes will prove that she gets you. Like, Really gets you. And me. And the bare essence of what it means to be a woman and living in this world. Because, after all, don’t we all put our bras on one boob at a time? Enjoy!
21 Tina Belcher Quotes to Prove that She Gets You. Like, Really Gets You.
“I’m no hero, I put my bra on one boob at a time like everyone else.”
When we’re trying to be modest, but c’mon, we’re awesome.
“Dear Lord Santa, this year please bless me with a calendar of Australian firefighters holding puppies in a casual setting.”
“I’m a smart strong sensual woman.”
Preach it, Tina.
“Time for the charm bomb to explode.”
Pulling out all the stops. Watch out for personality shrapnel.
“I’ve logged over 3,000 fantasy hours on my relationship…you don’t just throw that away.”
Someday those hours dreaming about Channing Tatum will pay off.
“Just when I think I’m out, those cheeks pull me back in.”
Gotta love a man in good fitting jeans.
“Is it possible to be in love with 25 people at once?”
Yes. Yes it is.
“Oh, it’s okay. I guess I wasn’t meant to have a good life.”
We’ve all been there.
“Here’s a bunch of numbers that may look random, but they’re my phone number.”
Whose got swagger? You’ve got swagger.
“If he has a butt for touching and lips for kissing, I’m going for that.”
Know what’s important in life.
“My heart just pooped its pants.”
I felt this way in my last haunted house. Though, it could have been more than my heart that did that…
“If you need me, I’ll be here on the floor dying.”
We all have to wallow sometimes.
“Brr. It sure is cold in here. I wish some strong, chivalrous man would lend me his jacket…or pants.”
Subtlety will never get a woman as far in life as directness.
“I have a complicated relationship with zombies. They’re dangerous, but I love their swagger.”
That’s how I feel about the men I date.
“Flirt a little, wink a little.”
“The hand wants what the hand wants. I can’t tell where your back ends and your butt begins.”
Hands have a mind of their own, don’t they?
“Last year I was a mummy. This year I’m a mommy mummy. I’m raising a child and going to a four-year college, all on my own.”
Ancient Egyptians everywhere are so proud of your efforts.
“Everything I know to be true just went out the window.”
When something life changing happens.
“I’m not spooked. What’s the next thing after spooked? I’m that.”
Again, that haunted house really got to me.
“Your ass is grass and I’m going to mow it.”
When you’re really angry. Or really turned on.
“I don’t need a boy to pay attention to me. I’ll pay attention to myself.”
BAM! *Drops the mic* *Walks away*