Tonight was incoming freshman night at the high school. We, the parents, followed our children around as they checked out the various clubs, organizations, and fine arts they can be a part of.
And I really realized that next year my daughter will be a high schooler.
I will be the mom of a high schooler.
There are some things I want her to know before she gets there, but the thing is the time of me just telling them to her is over. It’s a lot harder to get through to a middle schooler than you might think.
Here’s what I want my daughter to know before high school.
I am never too mad at you to be your mom. Sure I get mad, sometimes I lose my temper, and sometimes, when you really aren’t listening– I am going to raise my voice, but I am never too mad to be there for you.
I am your mom, and I love you more than anyone else in the whole world. There is nothing in this world you or anyone else can ever do to change that.
You’re going to do stupid stuff. I mean we are talking like REALLY stupid stuff. Stuff you are going to look back on and be shocked that you EVER thought it was a good idea.
It’s okay, stupid stuff is part of growing up. But when you get into trouble, no matter how ridiculous it is– talk to me. I might laugh at you, and I might tell you haw ridiculous I think it is, but we can fix it.
We can fix anything. Promise.
Most people are inherently good. But sometimes in high school kids try to disprove that theory. There are going to be some mean people. The worst are going to be the ones you thought were your friends.
No matter how mean they get, don’t stoop to their level. Walk away, and hold your head high.
They’re probably going to peak in high school and this is all they’ve got. You, on the other hand, are just getting started.
You’re gorgeous. You don’t see it. You see your imperfections, but everyone around you sees it. Everyone knows it. Your smile can light up a room.
Someday you will look back and be amazed at just how gorgeous you were in high school.
You’re also really really smart. I need you to trust your gut. It’s almost never wrong. The only times you’re going to make mistakes is when you don’t listen to it.
So stop, take a breath, and hear what it has to say. It’s right.
Don’t put yourself in an uncomfortable situation. Don’t go anywhere or do anything you don’t want to do just to please someone else. If you’re feeling uneasy, get the heck out of there.
And if you can’t leave– call me. I will come get you. No questions asked.
I love you. But most importantly I want you to love yourself. High school can be rough on the ‘ol self esteem. But you’re freaking’ awesome, and you need to remind yourself of that.
Several times a day.
Sometimes it’s going to hurt. That’s part of life. If we don’t feel the things that hurt, then we don’t appreciate the good things.
The hurt is part of the experience, too. It’s okay to fall down– just get back up and do it again.
You got this. I wouldn’t let you step into that building if you weren’t ready, but the truth is, this is your life now and your choices. I will always be here to guide you, but now it’s up to you to be the person you want to be.
So far, I think you’re pretty darn cool.