I have been home on quarantine exactly 72 days.
My husband has been home exactly 70 of those 72 days.
I have never felt the term “Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder” more than I do right now. I’m talking, I’m feeling it deep down in my soul.
I always thought it would be fun to have a job where my husband and I could work together.
I mean, he is my best friend, it would be so cool to be with him 24/7, right?
OMG. I have never been more wrong in my entire life.
It was on about day 4 of family quarantine that I was totally over it. My husband just wanted to lay on the bed and watch Marvel Movies.
Don’t get me wrong. I like Marvel Movies as much as the next person.
But, I still had to work — like an adult.
He got to sit there and play — like one of the kids.
I wan’t bitter AT ALL.
On day 5, I made a “Honey Do” list. It had things like: Flip The Mattress, and Change The Dead Lightbulb In The Garage. Easy stuff, right?!?
The list sat on the table. And sat there. And sat there. And sat there.
He made it through Captain America, Captain Marvel, Iron Man, Iron Man 2 — and then I lost track, but, never fear, they ALL got watched. Every. Last. Marvel. Movie. was watched.
I thought, “Great! Now, he’ll get to the list of things to do, and I won’t have to turn into that nagging wife.”
I’ve never been so wrong.
*Que the sound of the Star Wars Theme Music*
May the Fourth happened. That’s right, Star Wars Day.
Of course, now he had to watch All the Star Wars things — in order. He also thought it would “help me” to give a running commentary of the entire thing.
Meanwhile, I was still trying to work every. single. day.
The “Honey Do” list sat there on the table, mocking me, with its unchecked list of things to do.
I moved the list to the refrigerator for better viewing. It still sat there, flapping in the breeze of the air conditioner, and growing dust.
FINALLY he was done with the Star Wars saga.
“NOW,” I thought, “At Last! Something will get done.”
I walked in the kitchen, and there he sat, at the table, reading Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.
OMG. I almost lost it. Almost.
I tried to politely ask if the mattress had been flipped — knowing full well that it had not.
“I’ll do it when I finish this chapter.”
Update: He’s on Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. That’s the LAST Harry Potter book, in case you didn’t know.
Has the mattress been flipped? NO.
He goes back to work on Monday.
I’ve never been more ready in my entire life.
I love you, babe!