Totally The Bomb.com

Advice, Crafts, Travel and Everything Fun!

My LuLaRoe Leggings Don’t Judge Me

Heavy Handed Advice

Last week we were about to go see Rogue One finally. Yes, finally. I was trying to pick out something to wear and was feeling Star-Wars-Festive. I have this really cool, long sleeved Star Wars shirt and figured I'd wear that. But the leggings I own that match it were all dirty. Which meant I'd have to wear jeans. And at this point I hate jeans. My jeans judge me in a way my LuLaRoe leggings never will... My LuLaRoe Leggings Don't Judge Me Seriously, though, jeans. Ug! Okay. Well. The shirt was sort of hoodie like... I used to love wearing hoodies with jeans! At this point, Keep Reading >>>

I Can Say “Nipple Clamps” Here, Right?

Books That Don't Suck

It’s a post-Fifty Shades of Grey world, and there is a huge demand for super-sexy romantic novels. Authors work hand over fist to supply readers with what they want, and as a freelancer, I copy edit a lot of erotic romance. What does a copy editor do? Nitpick, mostly. Take a sex scene—the writer’s job is to describe the action and the emotions of the characters. My job is to make sure there aren’t too many hands or too few commas. I respect all my clients and their books, not matter how racy. But let’s face it—the fact that I have Googled “accidental butt-sex” as part of my job is a bit Keep Reading >>>

How To Make Your Dream Job A Reality

Heavy Handed Advice

Have you ever wanted a job for which you are COMPLETELY unqualified? I mean, you wanted it so bad that you could see yourself doing this job when you closed your eyes at night. You planned out, not even realizing you were doing so, what you would do in this fantastical position. You obsessed over this position, and daydreamed about it, always at inopportune times ... like when you were supposed to be doing your ACTUAL job. Please tell me I'm not the only one who has done this. Thing is, I'm starting to get to live one of my dreams, and in doing so I've figured out you can make your dream job Keep Reading >>>

Why Oliver And April The Giraffe Are #RelationshipGoals

Heavy Handed Advice

Social media has been flooded with messages about people waiting impatiently for the new baby giraffe at Animal Adventure Park in Harpursville, New York, but the only one waiting more anxiously than April the Giraffe is her baby-daddy, Oliver. This is the new four-legged power couple taking the internet by storm. And in my humble opinion, Oliver and April's girromance is total #RelationshipGoals. Why Oliver And April The Giraffe Are #RelationshipGoals Because their stalls are next to each other, Oliver has been able to keep a watchful eye on the Mother-to-Be and note her increasing Keep Reading >>>

Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss! There Is No One Alive Who Is Youer Than You

Books That Don't Suck

March second, otherwise known as Read Across America Day, otherwise known as Dr. Seuss’s birthday, has been celebrated by elementary schools across America since 1998. Everyone knows Dr. Seuss … cartoonist, storyteller, and one of my heroes (along with Walt Disney, because that is how I do this adult thing). There isn’t a person who doesn’t have a favorite Dr. Seuss book (and if you don’t, you're dead inside). Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss! There Is No One Alive Who Is Youer Than You For me, the first book I remember reading all the way through was Green Eggs and Ham, that silly book about Keep Reading >>>

I’ve Been Using Chopsticks All Wrong (And So Have You!)

Delicious Food

One of the biggest accomplishments of my adult life was learning how to use chopsticks. Not even a lie. It was on par with learning how to whistle or how to well, whistling is really the biggest shame. One of those things that people never want to admit that they just don't know how to do. Yes, for many years I was the person who had to use a fork at Chinese restaurants whilst surrounded by friends who were all chopping it up. Turns out, though, ALL OF US WERE USING THEM WRONG. My adult life has been a lie and I'm here now to rescue you from the same shame. Did you know there's a reason Keep Reading >>>

Whoever Invented Underwire Hated Women…And I Had The Rash To Prove It

Heavy Handed Advice

If you peeked into my underwear drawer you would find exactly one wired bra, but it's the one bra I refuse to wear. The only time I put that thing on is in the case of an end-of-the-world emergency, like when all my other bras are in the laundry and I don't want to venture outside braless (although sometime that argument still isn't strong enough to get me to put that cursed thing on). Sure, that bra makes my boobs look bigger and perkier, but I just can't tolerate that thing for more than a couple of minutes. I swear there are little tiny daggers sewn into the seams. Seriously, whoever Keep Reading >>>

…And I’m Just Waitin’ For A Pregnant Giraffe To Poop Out A Baby

Heavy Handed Advice

Poor April, April the giraffe. She doesn't even know she has become an internet and media sensation. April with the upside down heart spot on the left side of her neck, who rarely leaves her birthing stall, and has her baby daddy, Oliver, in the next stall over. Yes, we've all been glued to the Live Feed of this majestic momma, and memorized just about every spot, manerism, and feature of this now-famous animal (or maybe that's just me). We've all held our collective breath each time she moves, lays down, or for goodness sakes, even swishes her tail. "It's time," the comments inevitably read. Keep Reading >>>

8 Unexpected Perks Of Having Kids

Heavy Handed Advice

Why did I have children? Yes, they are lovely. They bring joy to our lives, and it's a privilege watching them blossom into adulthood. I got to be there when they started to crawl, learned to walk, said their first words, and got all teary-eyed as I ushered them off to kindergarten. I smiled outwardly (cringe inwardly) when they had their first crush, and cried with them after their first heartbreak. I love my children! But ... what's the real reason I had kids? Because there are at least 8 unexpected perks that come with being a parent. 8 Unexpected Perks Of Having Kids 1. Did Keep Reading >>>

Why I’ll Never Give Up My LuLaRoe…

Heavy Handed Advice

I guess this is a post I need to write once a year or something. The other day I was scrolling Facebook and saw a meme that was shared by someone from some new, non LuLaRoe legging company that shall not be named. Please note, this was a meme posted on this company's, I guess, official page. No, I won't name names. The meme had rules for wearing leggings. There were just two rules, but you only need a few words to body shame people. And that's why I'll never give up my LuLaRoe. They would Never have done something like THIS. Why I'll Never Give Up My LuLaRoe... So basically the meme Keep Reading >>>

Daddy-Daughter Dates And Why They’re Essential

Heavy Handed Advice

A friend of mine sent me a link about how creepy an author found Daddy-Daughter Dances and Daddy-Daughter Date Nights. The author wrote that the whole concept was weird and patriarchal and all those buzzwords insufferable people like to throw around. This piece really jammed me up because that very next night was our Daddy Daughter Dance, which would lead into our Daddy Daughter Date Night. So I read the piece and walked away shaking my head in disbelief that some people in the world project an “oogy” vibe on what’s basically teaching your daughter how to respect herself and what to expect in Keep Reading >>>

My Love Is A Bonus Taco

Delicious Food

My husband and I don’t really do lovey gifts. Valentine’s, anniversary, whatever. He doesn’t care if he gets a gift on Valentine’s Day. I used to care. A lot. Mostly because I’d been taught to care. All those TV sitcoms where the goober of a husband forgot a special day and had to scramble to come up with a thoughtful / expensive gift had me believing that if my man forgot any of our special days he was a terrible person. But that’s not true for us. I don’t think it’s true for anyone, really. Life is busy. If you add in all the birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Valentine’s Day, Keep Reading >>>

21 Funny Tweets In Honor of Valentine’s Day

Heavy Handed Advice

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and while many on Twitter are bragging about their romantic plans or lamenting the lack of a date, these fine men and women know what we really want -- to be entertained.  I've compiled 21 thoroughly wacky tweets about love, dating, and massive exasperation guaranteed to make you laugh. 21 Funny Tweets In Honor of Valentine's Day https://twitter.com/XplodingUnicorn/status/826152899327705088 Human women don't murder the males after sex, but every woman understands wanting to kill after a bad Keep Reading >>>

Turns Out I’m A Hufflepuff. Thanks A Lot, Sorting Hat!

'arry Pottah

So, I was at a conference (sort of) recently and seated for dinner with other writer/reader types—who are also good friends I get to see not often enough—when the conversation turned, as it does, to Hogwarts’ houses. Look, don’t even pretend you haven’t had the “what house would you be in” conversation, or secretly sorted all your friends and enemies into their appropriate common rooms. Maybe not for a while, but Harry Potter hasn’t ever dimmed on the public consciousness, not with the theme parks and now a new movie. And there’s Pottermore sort of like a fansite, but official. Now, the Keep Reading >>>

Wanna Turn Chores Into A Game? There’s An App For That…

Heavy Handed Advice

My whole life, I’ve been part of a family that teased each other. It’s a sign of affection and comfort, and the cleverest zings are the funniest. The goal is to make each other laugh, not to hurt anyone’s feelings… which is why no one teases me about my housekeeping. I am a terrible housewife. Granted, I never aspired to be a housewife. It’s not my calling. But, for the past 12 years, I’ve known that maybe I ought to be doing more chores than… well, the precise amount isn’t important here.  I used to clean when I worked up a nice panic attack about it, if that tells you anything. And I Keep Reading >>>

I Am Totally Into The Superbowl…Commercials

Heavy Handed Advice

There's a big ball game coming up. You know, the sportsball game where there are two teams. They run back and forth down a big marked field, and fight over an oblong ball. Sometimes they slap each other on the behind...I've seen it. I know what's up. Yes, it's an American thing. Don't worry, I don't really get it either. Obviously, I don't watch the game for the sport of it (I know, some of you are shocked, angry, and appalled at the thought). I don't even know who the competing teams are this year. I think it's some kind of bird team, and that team from New England (Is that even Keep Reading >>>

You Know It’s True Love When He Buys You Depends

Heavy Handed Advice

My boyfriend and I have been together a while now. We're beyond the honeymoon stage and firmly into making this our happy life together, crazy as those words sound. But I didn't really know how much he loved me, until he got me Depends. Yes, Depends. As in, adult diapers. You Know It's True Love When He Buys You Depends See, I had this nightmare of an experience with a kidney stone, an infection, surgery and horrible-awful-don't-wish-it-on-my-worst-enemy recovery period. And this is where love won out. Where I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt...my boyfriend is a freaking saint and Keep Reading >>>

Online Pearl Parties…Is That A Thing?

Crafts You Won't Make

I'd never even heard of an online pearl party until a couple of months ago. Now, I've been to 4 this month and I've bought two pieces. That's a rarity for me. It's a fun experience. I enjoy seeing what other people pick and which setting they've chosen. I like the suspense of the openings and the fellowship of other viewers as we congratulate the customer on their pick and then feel a small twinge of what I call "pearl envy." I love jewelry and, for me, this adds the mystery of an online subscription box into the mix. Plus, I get to witness the pearl coming out of its shell for the first time, Keep Reading >>>

In-Route Care Packages

These Things Are Better Than Your Things

Each and every day we have women and men who will brave the weather to make sure our letters and packages are delivered to us safely and on time. While we may see the holidays as the one time of the year to thank them, I say we should thank them all year long. That is why I came up with these In-Route Care Packages For Mail Carriers. This is perfect for USPS, FedEx and even UPS drivers! What You Need to Make In-Route Care Packages: Glad Entree Containers (Medium and Large will work) Protein Bars Mini Bottles of Water Pistachio Packets (can also use trail mix) Energy Keep Reading >>>

tips to brighten a small space

How I Took My Dining Room From Functional To Fabulous: 10 Easy Steps!

Home Decor You Will Forget To Make

I'm going to start with a confession: my dining room was never my favorite place. Sure, I love to cook, yes, I love to entertain, but for a long time that dark, small space is where we stored backpacks and stacked bags of groceries. These Affordable Tips to Brighten a Small Space changed all that. I Loooooove my dining room now. In fact, it might be my new favorite room in the house. I'm so excited to share these affordable ideas with you and I can't wait to see pictures of how you've transformed your own spaces. Happy DIYing! 10 Affordable Tips to Brighten a Small Space 1. Right off the Keep Reading >>>

Why I Refuse To Buy Bottled Ketchup (And Other Things I’ll Never Buy)

Heavy Handed Advice

There are a lot of things people do when they grow up. Their taxes, of course. Replacing old mattresses when they get worn. Eat oatmeal. Buy condiments... While I'm completely for replacing that old mattress and making sure Uncle Sam gets his due, I will probably never, ever buy ketchup that comes in the bottle. And oatmeal? Yeah, oatmeal sucks. I won't be doing that one, either. There are some things that people should buy new from the store (underwear, socks, bathing suits), but why does ketchup need to be one of them. Me? I refuse. I refuse to buy ketchup...and a few other things. Why Keep Reading >>>

How Princess Leia Changed The World

Heavy Handed Advice

Princess Leia changed my life. This is not hyperbole. I come from a pre-Katniss, pre-Buffy-the-Vampire-Slayer, pre-Hillary-Clinton era. I know this makes me sound old, but I grew up in Texas, so subtract like ten years from the female empowerment timeline. Oh, we had Governor Ann Richards, but she was considered an aberration. There was Ripley from Alien(s), but that was R-Rated, so I wasn’t allowed to see it. (Even though I did, because HBO.) The awesomeness of Sigourney Weaver’s casting deserves its own post, but in Alien, her femininity was (deliberately) not a factor. And I was a Keep Reading >>>

The 12 Baking Tips Of Christmas

Death By Dessert

Whether you are a seasoned chef or a backseat baker with a thousand viewing hours of Chopped, there are lots of little tips and tricks to getting the perfect pastry. Unfortunately we usually only figure them out after an epic baking fail. Here are some hard earned bits of baking wisdom that I’ve learned from my Mom and my own baking mistakes. Hopefully YOU won’t set your oven on fire. The 12 Baking Tips Of Christmas... The 12 Baking Tips Of Christmas 1. If you are making a single crust icebox pie and all you have to bake is the bottom crust, odds are you’ll just try to toss that sucker Keep Reading >>>

10 Holiday Songs That You’re Probably Not Sick Of

Heavy Handed Advice

Working at Starbuck during the holiday season is its own type of pumpkin spice flavored hell, but you don’t think about those poor baristas stuck listening to the same songs for six to eight hours. Shuffled or not, it’s enough to make you want to drown yourself in the coffee urn. I swear if I had to hear “Simply having a wonderful Christmastime” one more time I was going to Hulk-out and rip the speakers out of the ceiling. It still gives me flashbacks. But I love holiday music! I love the sweet, the silly, the secular, and the sacred. All of it…except the ones on Starbuck’s holiday Keep Reading >>>

Thoughtfully Thinking of The Holidays

These Things Are Better Than Your Things

Gifts that require some thought are the best ones. You literally are taking a moment of time (that you cannot get back) to think about what to get someone for a gift. After all, it's the thought that counts, right? I also think it's the gift that counts too. Thinking about and then choosing the perfect gift for someone, is priceless. That is why I challenge you to be Thoughtfully Thinking of The Holidays. In fact, we are partnering with Gigasavvy today to share just how you can get that perfect gift for the holiday season. Thoughtfully Thinking of The Holidays So here we are, just a few Keep Reading >>>

10 Reasons Why Living With A Parent Is The Best

Heavy Handed Advice

So, my mom lives with me. Or I live with her, depending on who you ask and how the royalty checks are going. We’ve cohabitated since my father died, and fortunately we get along pretty well. Or at least we have since I finished what my brother described as pubermenopause hell. You get a lot of looks when you tell people your mom lives with you. Ladies my mom’s age sort of glow with approval, and usually throw in an “isn’t that wonderful for you both.” Women my age look covetous of my live-in free babysitter, even though I don’t actually need one. Men my age view with skepticism the Keep Reading >>>

My Tree Will Never Make It To Christmas…

Heavy Handed Advice

Every year we go through the same thing: I put up a Christmas tree; my animals do everything in their power to take it down. I'd say it's the circle of life, but the truth is this is more a battle of wills between me and those little furry beasts I call pets. It's like they're possessed. And I don't understand...I mean, it isn't like the tree ever did anything to them. It's not like the tree comes in out of the cold throwing shade or something. It's a tree. And yet, every single year it happens...and the sad truth is I know how this is going to go down: my tree will never make it to Keep Reading >>>

5 Reasons Why December Babies Rock

Heavy Handed Advice

My birthday is December 5th. Just long enough after Thanksgiving and Black Friday that no one wants to go out and do something, and just enough into the month that there's sure to be a Christmas party on my birthday. There's some things about having a birthday in December that sucks: For the first ten years of my life I never had a "real" birthday party because my family was attending the National Finals Rodeo All of my friends forgot my Sweet Sixteen party because a shrew of a teacher decided to have a last minute exam and everyone hunkered down to study instead of coming to my Keep Reading >>>

A Man’s Guide To Manly Things: Part Two

Heavy Handed Advice

All right, guys. I’ve gotten onto you before, but you’re still screwing it up. You know how I know? Because I have to read about it all over Facebook and magazines. I have to see it on the streets. I have to hear about it in line at Starbucks. I have to smell it…I don’t know…I was trying to get all five senses in. Guys, what the heck is wrong with you? Why are we still having this conversation? Ladies, you may want to leave the house for a while. Get a coffee or see a Tyler Perry movie (they’re kind of not bad). I’ve got to spend some alone time with your man here because he’s screwing up Keep Reading >>>

10 Smart Ways To Work Slower And Get Less Done

Heavy Handed Advice

Sometimes you want to make the best use of your time. Like when you go to a buffet and want salad, dinner, and dessert. Sure, you look a little greedy carrying three plates back to your table at the same time, but at least you won't have to elbow your way back through the line to get your meal. Ammiright? It's good to be focused and productive. Work smarter, right? But sometimes you just want to take as long as possible to accomplish anything substantial. Some jerks might call this "procrastination," but I like to think of it as "alternative time management (ATM)." Below are some tips for Keep Reading >>>

I Love My Vicious Pit Bulls

Heavy Handed Advice

When I come home, I love being greeted by my dangerous pit bulls, they are so aggressive that they jump on me and lick me until I am covered in slobber. Afterwards, I have a pack that surrounds me with a hunger that won't be satisfied by anything less than lots of love and I am at their mercy because they get their way (most of the time). Then to make matters worse, I am mercilessly chased by them throughout the entire house and no place is safe-not even the bathroom. Somebody, please save me from these wild animals who only want love and attention from their owners! I Love My Vicious Pit Keep Reading >>>

Why I Chose To Be A LuLaRoe Evangelist

Heavy Handed Advice

Calling myself a LuLaRoe Evangelist sounds way better than saying I couldn't handle it as a consultant. Over the last few weeks I've had a lot of people say to me, "Man! You'd be a great LuLaRoe consultant!" And you know what? I probably would be! But I don't choose to be. And there are some really important reasons why! Why I Chose To Be A LuLaRoe Evangelist I love reading all of the consultant's stories about how LuLaRoe had changed their lives. It's given a struggling family financial freedom, it's let a single mom put her kids through school, it's changed lives. I love these stories. Keep Reading >>>

Honey Granola Cupcakes
IHOP Just Changed Their Name and I am Confused As To Why
10 Ways to Bond with Dad
New Emoji’s Coming Soon!
Rosanne is Human But, I’m Not Buying Her Excuse
Trump is a Liar and You Need to Stop Supporting Him
How to Play Jurassic World Alive
Mini Watermelon Cupcakes
What is GDPR and Why Should I Care?
50+ Summer Fun Ideas
Don’t Let Your Kids Watch Show Dogs
The BEST Royal Wedding Moments